come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
Cops are here now. U need to come back. Ur not under arrest. But u need to apologize to the woman for what you did to her cat.
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
How is it that you get into at least one taco related fight a year?
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
Remember when I peed in the trash can in the ATM room last night?
Never thought I'd say this, but thank god for my blackouts.
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
I can't figure out how to eat twizzlers and I have to be at a wedding reception in an hour.
Please never have kids.
Can I put tequila in the fish bowl? I think he wants to party too
Make sure you wash your hands. That seagull you threw was very sick.
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