You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
when your hometown is famous for abortion clinic bombings, hurricanes, and jude law's newest bastard, its probably time to move.
Dude you need to stop whoring out my boobs. They are for emergencies only.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
Can I get a DUI with a shopping cart? I've nearly hit 2 displays and little girl...
I had to stop mid sex to take my turn on words with friends so he wouldn't get suspicious. Hookup of the night helped me. We won.
I keep replaying commercials about kittens frolicking and was crying nonstop. WILL MY PERIOD LAST FOREVER!?
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
She needs more friends. Or a second therapist.
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
No clue what you did last night, sorry. You did hand me a pizza and a mason jar with $1200 in small bills in it when I let you in though.
Im sober enough to understand what people are saying but drunk enough to understand its hilarious
Randomize