Nice meating you last night
Not a typo
What I lack in compassion I make up for in lack of compassion
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
He thanked me for being "his little blond pogo stick last night". Good thing?
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working out is totally making me break out.. i'm doomed to forever be either a butterface or a butterbod. there is no way out.
I woke up to his little sister feeling me up. I guess it's time to meet the family.
everytime someone would look at you, you started to try and deep throat your beer bottle.
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
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Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
Was my mother there when I broke the stipper pole?
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
If one more person says Merry Christmas to me I’m going to take a pen out of my pocketbook and stab them in the eye
And he claims I gave him “fuck me” eyes while he was ordering me a happy meal
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