And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
At the end of the night you handed the bartender a piece of paper with the word "VISA" written on it.
He just walked into my room in a robe with a cooking pot of cereal.
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
If I wasn't stoned and knee deep in cheese and crackers I'd help.
I woke up on a park bench with a nice homeless guy waking me up. I bought us Carl's Jr. Best birthday ever!
Do not buy a prego test at the Walgreens you frequent. It's awkward. Just trust me.
P.s. There are few things I love more than brand new mascara and you are one of them.
Come get your boyfriend. He is hammered talking to me about hot dogs and casinos.
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
Randomize
