we are at a mexican restaurant and the tv is playing mexican porn. dad won't stop watching.
i'm drinking with a bunch of phds, i feel very stupid but good about my drinking abilities
I need to shower. I still have paint on me from the homeless guys
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Currently trying to figure out if the guy has a cane next to me or brought a weird dildo to the bar
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
You told the cashier at McDonald's not to smell the ones cause you had just got back from the strip club. Good deed.
My puffy vagina and I are on the way to the doctor to see what your mutant penis did to us THANKS A LOT
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Casually on the bus at 830 in the morning with a box of cheezits and a bottle of fireball sticking out of my purse....
It's time to run my sex life like a basketball team. Got the lesson Clint!
Had a slight melanoma scare this morning. Spoiler alert, it was Nutella.
I'm very impressed by your ability to explain a story about your fiery snatch solely in emojis. props.
Also, my old intern Lizzie whom you fed pizza to last night wants to hang out with you
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
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