i'm chasing tequila w mint flavored ice cream, phil's chasing it w cream cheese, bashar's chasing it w pickles...i think we all know who the winner is....
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
She was so drunk that I kept trying to switch out her wine for water. Sort of like Jesus, but in reverse.
Playing drinking games to Nancy Grace totally counts as "keeping up with current events.."
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
Well, I now know how many glasses of wine it takes for me to fuck my neighbor.
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences.
at least it wasnt animals
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
We all make mistakes. Just lock them up deep down inside your mind so they can surface as weird sexual fantasies it takes your therapist years to decipher when your 40
The best part about this city is obvious. Someone saw me crouching by a bar pissing in my leftover Panera bread bowl and they just winked.
Well, if it makes you feel any better I'll be drinking tequila and doing lines on Halloween. Just like old days.
She's not answering my calls
Well it sounds like you really fucked up
WHO HOLDS A GRUDGE OVER MEMES
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
why did you kick open the doors at church screaming whos ready to party?
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