I still think their baby is ugly. I also still think it's yours.
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
i left him drunk and in the fetal postion in the shower.
was the water running?
yeah but he said he knows how to swim
Oh my god. I think I just sexted my mom...
What?!
Fwd: Ride me, you sleek sleek woman!!!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
One of my friends found 6 bags of gummy bears on the roof. He lives a building over. Apparently even hammered you still have quite an arm
We were making out when she went into convulsions. At least now I know she's allergic to peanuts.
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I fingered myself to realization that I don't need birth control if there is never a guy.
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
There was so much jailbait at the festival that there was no other option but to drink my morals away
She tried to sing jingle balls while blowing me
One of my interns found me on Grindr. I'm really gonna make him earn the absurd amount of money I pay him.
he's a mother fucking interior design major!! we boned and fell asleep and now we're laying in bed discussing what color i should paint my room. i'm marrying him
Randomize