Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas??
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
You said you were going to take the sideview mirror to your own car so that nobody would steal it. Thats why you woke up with it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She just broke down showed up grabbed a beer said fuck it pulled off her fake eyelashes looked at my roommate and said we need to break up you're a nice guy and I'm a whore
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
I messaged him asking for his address. He replied with the address then said, "If you're gonna stalk me, I'm the third window on the side and usually get naked around 8am and anytime randomly after 6pm (listen for music).. If you're sending anthrax, I'm 6'2" 225lbs so send a good amount."
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm gonna look back at these days one day and be like "damn I shoulda been turnt but I was in bed instead watching netflix"
On a scale from 1 to banned, how offensive do you think it would be to wish my vibrator happy Valentine's Day on various social media outlets?
I AM A GOOD PERSON AND THEREFORE I DESERVE QUALITY DICK!
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
He updated Facebook... "Got a new phone today." WHAT ABOUT THE FUCKING KID YOU HAD?!
I attempted to walk home at 5:30 this morning cuz i was mad at him cuz he didn't want to cuddle and didn't have pizza. I got 3 houses down n fell over.
Randomize