Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
i just got a fart via voicenote. blackberry has officially changed history.
The fool I made of myself at the Ugly Christmas Sweater party last night was surpassed this morning when I walk of shamed 6 miles at 7am with one mysterious wet leg and no pants on. I think my mom saw me and waved.
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
how many times have i told you.. they dont like when you laugh during sex
you said "this ones for the homies" and proceeded to pour the shot into your other cup instead of the ground b/c "good liquor is not meant to wasted no matter the circumstances"
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
He put chocks of wood in front of his doors to stop me from leaving. I'm not nearly drunk enough for that to be appropriate behaviour.
10/10 dentists agree that he is one bangable mother fucker. hint: i am all of these dentists.
IM HAMMERED AND JUST HAD CHEESECAKE THAT MADE ME FEEL LIKE NO MAN HAS EVER MADE BE FEEL BEFORE.
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Okay. Did I say I did anything unusual? Because I usually do weird stuff. Did I clean mirrors? My mirrors are really clean, and I think I remember having windex..
Randomize
