I was so drunk last night, I had to Wikipedia what i did.
Note to Self: No matter how horny, turned on or in the moment you are, never go down on your gf after she had soccer practice.
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
Using the ceiling fan to slice the hotdogs in mid-air can only be contributed to our liberal use of 1800.
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
I won't apologize to a one balled man
Chipotle. Because when you've had diarrhea for 6 days why not just make it 7
Well, I'm most mad that he lied to you (about being married)...but the CAT THING IS A CLOSE SECOND
*goes to show prof a picture* *forgets tit pic is in camera roll*
It's only funny because he thinks you had sex with him to rob him.
You know something is wrong with your lifestyle when you have to clean easy Mac cheese powder off of your scale
at least it's not cocaine like last time
Randomize
