Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
I'm not going to blow you while you look at fish on the internet.
Apparently oprah and I were in competition to see who's ass could get bigger this summer
he left me a 6 minute video of him peeling a clementine listening to justin bieber
I'm gonna wear that dress that makes me look like a slut. You know, the one your sister got arrested in.
I'm riding in a wheelchair, being pulled by a golf cart. You need to be here.
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
The guy you fucked with the lazy eye is here, im avoiding contact by texting you. But i just looked up and he recognizes me, theres no way he doesnt. I'd remember the girl who called me quasimodo all night too. Sober me feels so bad.
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
My manager just held my hair while I threw up in a dumpster. New low.
HOW DO YOU FORGET TO FINISH WINE
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
he answered his phone during sex and left to go help that drama queen with her latest bullshit. I'm drinking all his vodka. it's asshole tax
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
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