can we take a shower together?
no need for the romantic shit. I'm a sure thing
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
I was just handed a mimosa the size of my head. Stay tuned.
Just found out my mom tried to sue the birth control company when she got pregnant with me...love you too mom.
I think it was you who decided that coming home at 3AM and cooking eggs topless was the best way to end our night. Eating the scrambled eggs off each other's boobs, that was ellie's idea
Just had to return the shit I stole from the dining hall, with everyone watching...apparently there ARE consequences for being drunk, coked up and belligerent.
Sometimes I send them texts like "I want to make you cry and lick up your tears" just to fuck with them. And THAT is how you get rid of a Stage 5 clinger.
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
'Twas I. Do you have any idea what it's like waking up to see you sent a text inviting someone to partake in "sexy rumpus?"
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
HOLY FUCK COMFIEST CHAIR EVER
I can feel your movements against the shared wall we are leaning up against. It makes me feel as though we are one. Queue Pocahontas song...
when the repo soundtrack came on in the middle of us having sex i realized it was about time that i clear out my itunes library
How many nights in 2015 can we have no one get injured, run away crying, or get into a brawl?
Randomize
