you were running down the aisles of wal mart singing 'follow the yellowbrick road'. i'm pretty sure you thought the night shift workers were the munchkins & started crying when they wouldnt help u find the wizard. needless to say u were pretty stoned/wasted
All I remember from last night is puking up a box of cheeze-its and the building catching on fire.
i just traded a sweatshirt for margaritas... why did they ever stop using the barter system??!!
And we started making out. She asked me to pick a number between 1 and 10. I said 6. She took me to her room. A few minutes later I wasnt a virgin. DUDE I WAS GOING TO SAY 2.
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
Apparently I grabbed her ponytail and cut it with an exacto knife.
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
Ur gonna wake up early as dick tomorrow to do some responsible shit but im the one up at 3 am right now cooking brats soaked in keystone light so fuck your falling asleep ass bitch
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
You put your finger on my lips and told me 'the butt is nature's pocket'.
I don't remember that at all, but I stand by what I said
Something bad happened. I'm just giving you some notice. So you can smoke some pot and hide all sharp items in the house.
No worries I have vodka. Its always on time
Look, if a guy shows up at your house. He's short, name is Logan, has weird vertical hair, let him in, give him food, and a place to stay. He's on a ver important mission. And I am he. as he is me and we are all together. And we are the eggman, goo goo gajoob.
What the fuck was I thinking eating an entire tub of potato salad on acid. My stomach today bro
Randomize
