I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
During sex she told me I could do anything I wanted to her. You remember that toy lightsaber we bought at Wal Mart?
Changed my sheets. Found a can of rockstar, crushed bag of tostitos, used tissues, and enough of both of our clothes to make a whole outfit.
i've already watched her fall off the steps, walk up on our porch and try to dance with the dog, and stumble across the street to stand outside the neighbors window...is it taking it too far to watch this rando girl and some guy have sex behind our parking lot now?
I swear a good massage is the easiest way in my pants.
Not that there's a hard way... but you know what I mean.
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
At one point during xmas dinner my whole family was double fisting. It was like thats how I learned to drink moment
I was walking around the party holding a dog on my shoulder like it was a parrot
I don't know. She kept pirouetting across the kitchen while making dinner. I just sat there stoned.
Best day ever, my junk is bigger than Kate Uptons boyfriends. Yay for Fappening day!
Nothing like a little " am I gonna shit myself " to spice up the work day
I'm eating chocolate cake while this guy snaps me from the gym. Like I cant believe i actually considered getting rid of this cake. Have fun sweating ima eat this cake 👌
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
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