he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
While you were puking in the ocean I was rubbing your back saying "Just give it back to Mother Earth".
Apparently I was trying to convince him Springsteen has had buttsex. I ended the argument with "I bet he came from it too."
I've learned something. I regret way too may Tuesdays in my life to be normal
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did you dip my ponytail in franzia? its the only thing i can think of to explain my hair right now.
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
We drove around last night shotting fireworks out the window while they had sex in the back of his car
omg just made cake vodka jello shots, sooooo excited
dear god these taste like death. death and sprinkles
I made friends with the delivery guy because he had beautiful dread locks and was a Zelda fan. He texted me after he left saying he wasn't trying to be creepy but we should be friends. We're hanging out tomorrow.
How does this kind of shit happen to you?!
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White girls? They're everywhere. In packs. Drunk white girl packs.
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
You are the best. Or certainly adequate for tempering my unholy desires.
That's the nicest thing you've ever said to me.
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
I’ve cut back on drinking and now my body can’t fight off all the bad germs without the alcohol. That’s why I keep getting sick
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