Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (209): View more from California

  dude, you're never picky with who you hook up with, have a little dignity

  (1-209): View more from California

  nah man, chicks are like pokemon, gotta catch \'em all

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  (209): dude, you're never picky with who you hook up with, have a little dignity (1-209): nah man, chicks are like pokemon, gotta catch \'em all http://tfl.nu/t93h
  Replies (45) Good night (15657) Bad night (1796)
• Favorite

  (317): View more from Indiana

  I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.

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  (317): I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure. http://tfl.nu/rujq
  Replies (23) Good night (716) Bad night (4269)
• Favorite

  (812): View more from Indiana

  When the phrase "Wow your huge" came out of her mouth I knew it was gonna be a good night.

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  (812): When the phrase "Wow your huge" came out of her mouth I knew it was gonna be a good night. http://tfl.nu/n33w
  Replies (21) Good night (11852) Bad night (706)
• Favorite

  (843): View more from South Carolina

  He left an unopened 12 pack of beer by my bed. I guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex..

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  (843): He left an unopened 12 pack of beer by my bed. I guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex.. http://tfl.nu/g01t
  Replies (17) Good night (5071) Bad night (640)
• Favorite

  (925): View more from California

  its a long story involving jim bean, an owl, and a knife

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  (925): its a long story involving jim bean, an owl, and a knife http://tfl.nu/e55k
  Replies (17) Good night (3949) Bad night (1164)
• Favorite

  (814): View more from Pennsylvania

  You rolled out of the car, got on all fours and puked then just nonchalantly stood up and waved goodbye and thanks for the ride.

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  (814): You rolled out of the car, got on all fours and puked then just nonchalantly stood up and waved goodbye and thanks for the ride. http://tfl.nu/0b9w
  Replies (6) Good night (3940) Bad night (921)
• Favorite

  (250): View more from British Columbia

  Just think about how many life skills I lack. Cooking... Driving... Sobriety...

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  (250): Just think about how many life skills I lack. Cooking... Driving... Sobriety... http://tfl.nu/2t4m
  Replies (8) Good night (3276) Bad night (1142)
• Favorite

  (330): View more from Ohio

  Received a verbal warning at work for "riding in a trash receptacle, violating professionalism & infection control."

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  (330): Received a verbal warning at work for "riding in a trash receptacle, violating professionalism & infection control." http://tfl.nu/dz9s
  Replies (12) Good night (1638) Bad night (552)
• Favorite

  (937): View more from Ohio

  You better fuck one or both of those bitches and bring me pictures that will make me uncomfortable

  (1-937): View more from Ohio

  I can do at least one of those things.

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  (937): You better fuck one or both of those bitches and bring me pictures that will make me uncomfortable (1-937): I can do at least one of those things. http://tfl.nu/zzd3
  Replies (2) Good night (1747) Bad night (445)
• Favorite

  (+97): View more from

  Seriously. My vagina. Can we talk about it? It's gonna jump off this treadmill and devour my trainer.

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  (+97): Seriously. My vagina. Can we talk about it? It's gonna jump off this treadmill and devour my trainer. http://tfl.nu/wfti
  Replies (8) Good night (1549) Bad night (408)
• Favorite

  (603): View more from New Hampshire

  I renamed his cat Jeff last night. Well I spray painted it on him.

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  (603): I renamed his cat Jeff last night. Well I spray painted it on him. http://tfl.nu/nzef
  Replies (5) Good night (1130) Bad night (1112)
• Favorite

  (269): View more from Michigan

  Dude, those shrooms u gave me made me remember writing the bible. Fuckn awesome

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  (269): Dude, those shrooms u gave me made me remember writing the bible. Fuckn awesome http://tfl.nu/saqv
  Replies (4) Good night (1302) Bad night (654)
• Favorite

  (414): View more from Wisconsin

  They ran out of toilet paper, so I had a girl rip down the streamers so I could wipe.

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  (414): They ran out of toilet paper, so I had a girl rip down the streamers so I could wipe. http://tfl.nu/qow6
  Replies (3) Good night (334) Bad night (655)
• Favorite

  (812): View more from Indiana

  god, I have more takeout restaurants in my contacts than friends

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  (812): god, I have more takeout restaurants in my contacts than friends http://tfl.nu/rf2n
  Replies (3) Good night (380) Bad night (572)
• Favorite

  (708): View more from Illinois

  what better way to celebrate the birth of jesus christ than to get embarrassingly intoxicated and make poor decisions!?

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  (708): what better way to celebrate the birth of jesus christ than to get embarrassingly intoxicated and make poor decisions!? http://tfl.nu/lygu
  Replies (0) Good night (486) Bad night (216)

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