He wants to be 'in an open relationship'. Fuck that. That's the online equivalent of letting him pee in a circle around me.
i just remember sitting on this bed, naked, STILL WITH A CONDOM ON, and suddenly these random girls were in the room shouting at me
I don't like finding out that my fuck buddy is a good person.
I might lose an organ but I've got booze. I'll be fine.
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
Direct quote from her that tipped me off I was getting some: "I want to jump on his shoulders and wrap my legs around his face"
Who knew there were so many rules and judgements about laying on a kitchen floor. I'm all like I'm resting. It just happens to be on a kitchen floor.
Jesus, I think this onesie was designed to keep me from masturbating.
I'M MAKING HIKING PLANS WITH THE GIRL WHO IS DATING MY EX, THAT IS PERSONAL FUCKING GROWTH
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
My mom is currently drinking alone in our kitchen singing the Dixie Chicks to herself so, hey, alcohol is forever and we should not be shamed for its use.
You know it was a weird night when you find curly fries in your purse the next morning...
I want to get a list going called "D list celebs I've kissed"
Was he a virgin!? DID YOU TAKE A GUY'S VIRGINITY ON MY FLOOR!?
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever