Those balls look pretty dangerous.
so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
woke up with 15 BAGS of hot dog buns in my passenger seat... jameson strikes again
heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
I need to get my pants from under your porch. People are asking questions.
I am literally hand feeding my crying ex boyfriend taco bell. What has my life become?
I'm going to have to start playing roller derby again so I can blame my sex-related bruises on that.
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
i just told him to get ready, because I'm going to be taking out my anger over the Super Bowl out on his penis.
I woke up to both of you drawing on me in sharpie, unless a glorious threesome was had the night before that is not okay.
Who says it wasn't?
FUCK YEAH PUPPY BOWL
Weight watchers just said "you've tracked beer three times recently, want to make it one of your favorites?" I'm begining to understand why I needed to go in the first place.
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
Randomize
