its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
i wanted a birthday blowjob. not a birthday VD.
It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
I think I should just accept my destiny that I'm going to be someone's second wife
My tits sealed my fate
You get home ok?
Uh, you stopped by my house at 4 am and woke me up, so yeah.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
as i sobered up i realized that her cute accent was actually a speech impediment
Hey I'm sorry for head butting you last night. Personally I thought it was funny at the time, but I can see how from your perspective it may not have been as enjoyable for you... Hope your lip is okay.
No more pre-dentist shots, I just puked on my hygienist
How do I send someone an apology text for giving them a lap dance in the middle of a party last night?
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
I’ve had a lot of vodka, 3 different dicks and no food since last night. Come get me
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