Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
the party we crashed was not a party. the party we crashed was jens grandads funeral.
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
We really need to check into harvesting part of our liver now
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
We are smoking a hash blunt ... Bring your emergency inhaler
Just showered now I smell like berries instead of shame
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
I have migrated to the couch. Minimal movement is still happening, but I should be mobile enough to go to the liquor store by eight.......so that good.
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
I've started budgeting for next year. It looks like I'll be crying tears of dollar bills and handing them over to pay back my unholy college debt.
I'm drinking with a guy who apparently blew my dog sitter.
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
I was amazing, unlike anything he's ever experienced. I somehow made him feel young and old.and he never felt old before. He feels I will literally kill him. With my magic, lethal vagina.
Randomize
