Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it
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I feel like none of my dresses scream slut the way I'd like them to
Dude you should see the looks were getting for ordering a pitcher of beer with breakfast.
She poured a bottle of rum in the champagne fountain, did like 5 jello shots at the same time, then lit herself on fire. Twice. This is how everyone should turn 21.
We got jeff a deep fryer for his bday. So far the count is two potatoes and your iPod.
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
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I was going to ask the people in the kitchen to keep the volume down, but they're cooking pasta at 3 AM and one complimented me on my polka-dot nightgown. They're high. No volume control.
Wound up hungover. Visiting 4 y/o nephew suggested cookies and milk and playing Kirby with him with the sound down. This kid is going places.
pizza hut and my weed lady just showed up at the same time. I feel 22 again.
Just sold our expired ticket for a free night of bowling to a drunk guy downtown for 50 bucks. Ill buy beer on my way home
I was cock-blocked by a swat team last night.
I will literally have glitter in my crotch for weeks.
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