if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
Two grown ass men just come into the bar riding humongous tricyles
It was the most graceful puke ever. I just thought she dropped something underneath the bar until she told me what happened.
Just got discharged from the hospital after getting my finger stitched back together don't you dare say you had a worse night than me
I can't even properly respond cuz I'm ballsdeep in falafel
This isn't good. I can't find my mom. This is why we don't give her Fireball.
So... I may have accidentally just sat on a strip of a home waxing kit.. naked... Assistance is definitely needed....
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
No more bourbon. Sleep now. I may die. Pray for me.
But like, I don't remember getting hit with the door... I just come out from peeing and there was blood running down my face.
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
woke up with a tree in my apartment. also the everclear bottle is suspiciously low
suspiciously? i think one of those explains the other
Randomize
