is your mom at the bar?
he gave me an orgasm. multiple times. the weird stuff he did in middle school is now irrelevant.
So I was just looking through the calendar on my phone seeing what day new years was on & on dec 31st at 9am it says "nude champagne toast". Guess we have to do it.
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
The doctor said 'youre the 2nd youngest person that ive seen with this condition. Thats probably not the silver medal you were looking for today.'
i want to swaddle you in tequila
it's kinda bad that we're already planning travel arrangements to his funeral
I WALKED myself out of breath. And I'm lost I'm a Tim Hortons parking lot. That's how hungover I am.
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
Someone snapchat me a pic of you topless laying on the bar with Scotty pouring a bottle of tequila down your throat. IT'S NOT EVEN ELEVEN YET.
School starts next week
Sorry I punched you in the throat. You got in my way. You understand.
alright well Taco Bell Closes at 12 so you better pray to god she's asleep by then or I'm running in your house butt ass naked with a bag of tacos
I'm sorry I called your mother a reasonably-priced receptacle.
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
Randomize
