how the fuck am i supposed to make breakfast with spaghettios and mustard
If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
you never realize your highschool teachers are real people till you fuck one of them
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
Let me shower first- i smell like sex and rock climbing (not so sure how that happened)
Did you ask me to bring you a t-shirt to class or did I just dream that?
No, I did. It's a long story.
He said I could liberate his beef and all I could think about was how I don't eat veal for political reasons.
Do you remember the bathroom attendant when he put out his hand for a tip and you gave him a high five?
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
I just spent 30 minutes plucking my 2 month grown out pubes with tweezers so I’m hope your night is going better than mine
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
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