As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
I'm buying eyelash glue, salt, and limes. We know how tonight is ending.
It's because you were crossfaded. And because drinks were 3 dollars. And because they accepted credit cards.
They actually said and I quote "it definitely looks like your knees went through some over usage"
I feel like this has turned into my work. But if I get paid sitting under a desk, that's perfectly fine with me.
I think I'll handle my grief by throwing myself headlong into lesbianism. Seems like a fitting tribute to you.
Well I just found the most comfortable way to pass out on my toilet if I ever have to.
Its a good thing to know for upcoming events.
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
There's weed in my toothpaste. Explain.
So will your sis find it a compliment if I tell her I lost out on some awesome dick to go to her bday dinner???
You chose shitty college football over this pussy and my cute little mouth. That's your fault.
I know it sounds cheesy, but i think both me and her mum know they are "thanks for being so cool about finding nudes of your daughter on the camera" flowers
You some how ended up sleeping on one of the beams that run along the ceiling of your house
oh dont worry mom i am not sick my cough is from a recent increase in recreational drug use
that will happen
Randomize
