Can someone please explain to me why I woke up looking like Ziggy Stardust
it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
Woke up in 100% not my clothes this morning. Third time this month. Fuck. Tequila.
Dude i think i got lasagna in my eye
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
He was still there when I ran half naked into my suitemate's room where she was skyping her boyfriend and I started singing I JUST HAD SEEEEX
All's fair in love and war. and tinder.
Sorry that I was such a monster last night. It was the drugs, I promise.
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My greatest achievement in life thus far is being the go to friend when you have questions about butt plugs.
alcohol and riverdancing are a dangerous mix. have a spraind ankle. i die now
It's five in the morning. wtf?
Uhmmmm is there really any way to tactfully ask "you into me jerking you off with my feet... or nah" cause if you find one let me know 😂
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
Apparently my hair turned out really good because I got my butthole licked by a stranger last night
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