It was at that point the crowd that gathered realized i wasn't getting arrested, and passed the sobriety tests. I got a standing ovation from 25 strangers
Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
Masterbating to gospel music is like god cheering on your orgasm
Did you seriously take investment advice from our coke dealer?
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
Woke up with a full plate of KFC next to my face. I didn't really question it.
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
The fun I thought I would be having now when I was six is vastly different from what I am currently doing. Hurraaay sex and vicodin.
it's always good to have a friend that's a hairdresser, a massage therapist, maybe throw in a lawyer just in case, and always have a friend on food stamps
In the last six hours i have procured a free sandwich, watched three movies, and came to orgasm. If that isn't productivity then i don't know what is.
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
Is it bad that I'm using the photo I took for my fake ID as my linkedin profile pic?
Last night I had a sex dream about Trudeau, he hasn't even been prime minister for 24 hours
Randomize
