Yea, forget your mom. She will be home after her one night stand.
like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
she is the kim kardashian of front butts
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were pretty committed to that cat costume. Between pukes, you would meow and assure people that you just had a hairball you couldn't get out...
I've always wanted to pass out in a bathtub
I think most people do. Your only real mistake was turning the water on first.
I really hope your new roommate never finds out we had a threesome with a bisexual British guy in his room the night before he moved in.
I got a lap dance from a guy last night dressed as a school girl. Heels and all. His heels got stuck in my fish nets
You kept asking her which dick pills worked the best. She's a grandmother.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
Thank you. I woke up with a beard hair in my mouth. Super classy.
It’s like a buffet of marriages! Every option is available to you!
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
i need to get drunk because i'm an angry sober
Randomize