office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
Clearly he doesn't understand my need to be surrounded by cats at all times
When I look at old family photos I know how jessica simpson feels when she watches dukes of hazzard
You gave the cab driver your pants as collateral while you ran in the house for money.
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
I almost just texted "I'm lonely" to my gynecologist.
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
I'll be an awkward "I've had the grooms penis in my mouth" presence and we can party our nipples off.
What the hell was that?
Genius. It was sheer genius.
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
Randomize
