Just saw a guy at the gas station legitimately dressed in exactly what my costume was last night. Fuck his life.
We went to red robin and there was a 15 minute wait so we went and fucked in the car. Quickies, endless fries, and a mascot handing out balloons- this is literally the night of my dreams.
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.
I'm gonna be a few minutes late, some asshole just fell off the ferry so we had to stop.
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
I literally just wiped coffee off of the corner of my mouth with my boob because my hands were full. Thought youd be proud. Good morning!
i made sure not to drool on your bed by putting my hoodie on backwards and swaddling my face in the hood
I woke up to the sound of him repeatedly tapping out SOS in Morse Code using his hard cock.
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
I just realized I'm having shark week, during shark week.
It's three am. I'm drunk in a stairwell in Vegas. My flight leaves at six. Help.
Randomize
