His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
and then he said that some chick told him he danced like an epileptic on crystal meth. he then proceeded to demonstrate this statement, which i can testify is 100% accurate.
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
The trash can in my living room is full of Popsicle sticks and my vibrator has taken up permanent residence on my coffee table. I'm not doing anything productive. Clearly.
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
Just keep in mind that she didn't start telling you you had the largest penis she had ever seen until AFTER she found out about your multi-million-dollar trust fund.
your life is going to be an empowering working mom montage tomorrow to Katy P's ROAR... --are you living in a yoplaít comercial?
You kept purposefully giving me wrong directions, laughing, then yelling at me for taking directions from a drunk person.
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
Fuck it, I'm going to make my own dick pic album since iOS 10 won't do it for me.
Randomize
