2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
separated laundry into 'got laid' and 'didn't get laid' piles.
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
I wonder if they'd let me siphon the gas out my car before they impound it
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
I don't remember anything past "we have 15 minutes to drink this keg."
I woke up in a poorly constructed blanket fort on a strange office floor covered in rug burns and champagne. How was your night?
I DON'T EVEN KNOW ONE MINUTE IM SITTING HER THE NEXT IM FLYING PASSED THE MOON
PISSING MYSELF IN ZERO GRAVITY
THOSE AIN'T STARS U SEE TONIGHT GURL
He took a girl home at like eight, fucked her, kicked her out, came back to the bar, and repeated the process again at 10:30 and 2:30. THREE GIRLS IN ONE NIGHT. ALL PICKUPS. I HATE HIM.
Yeah, sorry about that. Dropped the phone on my face while I was watching porn.
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
Randomize
