i realized my work ethic and productivity really improves if i masturbate on my lunch break.
My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
Like that girl needs to get her shit together. For her vagina's sake.
He stripped down to boxers and then started flinging jello shots with a spoon into people's mouths like a catapult.
She was wasted talking to my dad about the hunger games than she passed out in the shower and flooded the hotel room...
High enough to ask the woman at best buy if she ever feels like she's swimming. and telling the man outside that he smells like happy juice.
After he finished going down on me he came up from under the covers, threw his hands into the air and shouted "take that lesbians!" and finished with "and we have dicks!"
My mind's like "He's a sexist pig" but my uterus is like "YOU SHALL BEAR HIM STRONG CHILDREN"
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
there’s plenty of nice guys out there with good jobs and NO felonies!
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
So nothing to worry about, but i'm probly going to jail soon, just thought i should let you know so you didn't worry. Bye!
Randomize
