left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
He kissed my cheek and I could smell it the whole way home like shit
I fell asleep at the bar. And the bouncer threw a snowball at my face.
The sex I just had was not worth missing a girls night out.
I think my goal for this black wed is to not scream at an off duty state cop in a bar after trying to flirt with him. No need to make that an annual tradition
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
It was like the devil him self busted his red hot satanic nuts all over my face and burned my eyes out of my innocent sockets.
Well I'm about 60% wine, 30% pure rage and 10% tears at the moment and I'm disappointed in how little alcohol is in me
I'm going to give you the best blowjob of your life. And yes you can use my mom's printer.
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
Randomize
