lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
A slipped finger up the butt isn't the end of the world
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
I've eaten cheese dip for three consecutive meals. I think I need to branch out.
Dude this breakup has officially hit rock bottom. sitting around watching women's NCAA basketball instead of going out
After he came all he could say was how great the lighting fixtures where in my apartment.
How can I not totally like a guy that told me my boobs were too big for me to be taught how to play golf?
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
A surplus of mistakes were made and I don't know what 89% of them were.
I didn't wake up drunk this year...I must be getting soft
Yeah I guess quad-fisting Miller Lites just isn't as effective as it used to be
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
If you find me in the bathroom in a fetal position, licking frozen bacon .. I might have Drank a little too much.
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