If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
When he came he sounded like a flock of birds hitting puberty
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
If I walk in on you beating off, at least have the fucking decency to STOP BEATING OFF!
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
You got banned for life from a $30 a night motel. What are you doing with your life?
Okay so I've been talking to the mice again and they agree with me that you're a piece of shit.
You're incredible, and I'm drunk
I swear I only fuck him for the huge bottle of smart water he gives me afterwards.
Randomize
