I woke up this morning in a strange bed with a kid with an accent playing with my feet.
Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
I'm watching tv and he's trying to stick a vibrator in my ass
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
Who the hell brings a 6pack to a party. I'm trying to make mistakes.
Throw up on the ground, people dancing to loud Bollywood music, seats literally missing. Fuck I hate public transit
You were making dinosaur noises while jerking me off..
my six pack is really starting to show since I started fucking everything that moves
WHAT? When did I ever refer to one of my past hookups as "the rainforest guy"?
we were looking for paper towels to wrap his hand and i yanked a drawer out of the cabinet, it was fun so we just kept doing it. things escalated and long story short, he isn't gettin his security deposit back
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
I just went through the Wendy's drive thru only wearing a towel. My life has hit an all time low
Sent him a snap chat of him eating me out so he can relive the moment.
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
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