covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
I get drunk and say inappropriate things... you get drunk and sleep with inappropriate people. it's what we do.
new girl just came onto the hall stumbling drunk with no shoes on and the guy who brought her doesn't have them either
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No, that was the night I was sneezing out barf
we put a pacifier in your mouth because you kept drunkenly singing country music.
Just drove past the dude that came in your sock
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
Bartender just fed me brownie. Its going to be a good night
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Just had a shirt made that says "I'm sorry" going to wear it every sat and sun morning for the foreseeable future
Jimmy johns delivers to the bar behind work. Happy vodka day!
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
My apologies. I'll try not to let my dick interfere with official work duties in the future.
Why would you get kicked out?
Well, an overweight man is currently not wearing a shirt. Or pants. And is getting in touch with his inner Chippendale. You can probably fill in the blanks.
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
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