How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
maybe we can find two twins tonight and bang them together and then my life is complete
I forgot to tell you the best part. The folded up paper he wrote his number on opened up to be a picture of him when he was younger wearing a Columbia tshirt in front of NASA and in pen said his name and "space consultant."
... was I dreaming when we did coke off of the xbox, or did that really happen?
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
You asked me to pick a color between pink and purple, and I said orange; you told me, "okay, that's a truth question". Then you asked if I had ever deep-throated a cupcake...I didn't even know what to say.
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
I think I'm just gonna exercise my lungs and fingers. With bong hits and crochet. BECAUSE I AM A REAPONSIBLE ADULT DAMMIT!!
No, no... It was great. I feel like my liver took a vodka shower and washed it's hair with pabst
Just to let you know we went to the circus yesterday...in case you didn't remember
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