I found him crying and drunk, in my closet holding a picture of Tyler Perry. He managed to say"he's just so many people"
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
She went into the basement and sang to my cat for three hours....she actually has a beautiful voice....
You remember those guys we called the police on after they stole our keg? Turns out one of them is a student instructor in one of my classes. Figuring out how best to use this information.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
I have way too big of a thanksgiving food baby to enjoy any of my old high school booty calls
Last I saw, they went for a smoke and only one came back. He passed out outside. I'm glad he's only 120lbs. I left him on the rug still. My mom is gonna be pissed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She must've been waiting down the street cause after I said I specialized in inner-thigh-face-massage it couldn't have been 2 minutes until she was on my couch.
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
Which one of you drunk assholes put a parental lock on my cable box last night? More importantly, what's the pin? I'm missing the UK game.
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
He just didn't want his drunk dick pulled out of his windbreaker at the family party
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
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