I wish I only lived at night.
you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
i just got so high i needed a buddy system to the kitchen
working out is totally making me break out.. i'm doomed to forever be either a butterface or a butterbod. there is no way out.
I found a map from his room to his bathroom this morning in my purse. Apparently I was too fucked up to get there without one.
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
Just showered now I smell like berries instead of shame
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
You got me so high that I almost couldn't leave my house for a bar because there was nothing to lean against on the way there
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
We're keeping you on a leash this Saint Patrick's Day
When I go to hand him the blunt and he's eating a cookie and responds with "let me hit this cookie"
I just found glitter glue on my jesus bracelet...am I really that gay?
You are, as of last night, the self declared king of pooping. Long may you reign.
Randomize
