Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts.
My dinner was lean cuisine and tequila. Aaaaaand I need a boyfriend.
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
I had a dream she was puking on me, but sadly in real life she was puking on me too
Made out with a girl in a wheelchair and rode her around while I was blackout. On a new level.
I was dressed as bob Ross as this occurred
Dude. Remember the only two rules I set for that? Always have a sober friend and don't do drugs with a fat chick.
Rather than admit to myself he's hooking up with her right now, I choose to believe that he's not responding because he's masturbating to my picture, distraught over his poor choice, and trying to forget about the one that got away with a heavy dose of meth.
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
Can we talk about how she only slept with you because you remind her of a member of a K-pop group?
Last night was like blooper reel sex. He dropped me!!
Yeah well I just had an orgasm on my bathroom floor so there's a first for everything I guess
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
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