She just squirted all over my face. then laughed at me and took a pic
What happened last night?
You soiled yourself again and told everybody that you'd given birth.
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
if my vagina gave out awards, he should be preparing acceptance speaches for the oscar, the heisman and the nobel peace prize.
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
it was like a zeppelin in a condom
I am literally hand feeding my crying ex boyfriend taco bell. What has my life become?
about 90% sure I fell off a roof. It hurts BAD. Don't suppose you're still in town?
yup haha I infact DID fall off a roof. Want some bomb ass omlettes?
Also, no joke, I think that raccoon hair is still in my eye from last night.
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
Woke up in a cemetery. Puked in front a funeral ceremony that was going on.
Randomize
