It was at that point the crowd that gathered realized i wasn't getting arrested, and passed the sobriety tests. I got a standing ovation from 25 strangers
I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
How was dinner with ur grandparents?
I was really blazed and scared they'd catch me, so when they asked about my day I was concentrating really hard on not saying smoking that instead I honestly said "Well, I had sex on your pool table, Nana."
you ever fart during an orgasm? feels like u just lost 10 pounds
The crowing achievement of my life is still the time I made a 3 course meal out of things I found in the dumpster.
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
Squirrels and blue jays and dove-like things. They're just frolicking around in my backyard. I wanna be like them.
Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes.
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
You asked the waitress what the corking fee would be on the Joose you smuggled into the restaurant.
There is a direct correlation between gooch size and male fertility. Science.
Actually, I take that back. You can only have it if I'm allowed to French braid the mullet.
He went to cum on my stomach and somehow it got behind my ear. He's like a fucking jizz Houdini.
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
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