Your date looks like the Cloverfield monster. good luck.
maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
On my arm I have 12 dashes, and below is written "plus 2 pretty stout whiskey drinks, so, you be the judge"
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
well, duh, but it's like you don't even want to see me masturbate with a wine bottle.
They don't allow McDonald's in the ER. Go figure
I masterbated to the rocky theme song. I'm pretty sure that just beat any sex experience I've ever had.
She's blowing me while I'm watching air jaws. I love shark week.
Just got a blow job from a woman on a ski slope. She said ski'ing frightens her and giving head calms her down. Glad I could help ma'am!
I got poked in the eye with a penis last night. How's your day?
THIS FUCKNUGGET
DOES HE EVEN REALIZE HOW MANY INCREDIBLE INSULTS I'VE WASTED ON HIM
I'VE INSULTED THE EVERLOVING SHIT OUT OF HIM AND HE CAN'T EVEN APPRECIATE IT
THE HO
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
Randomize
