Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
hey dude i know youre in the next room but me and your sister need a condom, got any i could borrow?
i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
Almost peed between 2 cars...till I realized that it's daytime and I'm sober.
No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
It was as if you forgot how to speak normally. All of your words came out either backwards or in song form
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
I woke up in a place I've never been before, with people I've never met before using me as a table for domino's.
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
Classic dick move. Breaking up your buddies 3-some by coming into his room and doing the Harlem Shake.
I am going to tweet NASA until they put me into space
Those rocketship riding assholes need the common man
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