Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
it hurts more in the daytime
I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
you kept spraying the cat with water and then telling it to "man up" when it cried
She just used a chaser for red wine.
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
i chugged some hot sauce before i gave him head. i think a burning penis is a great way to say fuck you
I woke up in the closet and then I found my shirt in a bag of Doritos... how does that work out?
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
I haven't been hungover in so long I'm actually looking forward to it
He said he couldn't fuck me cause I kinda looked like my brother
I climbed to the top of a stripper pole and touched the ceiling. Accomplishment?
So...I know we have a conversation later this week. But one of the key things I want to know is if I can specify having my body mummified and buried in Egypt (or at least nearby the Luxor in Vegas). How much money do you think that would cost? Do I need to increase my life insurance policy?
Randomize
