people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
You had a beer at 10:30 this morning?
Ya, I didn't have any Tylenol.
I just had human shit waiting for me at the top of the escalator at Bowery. This is truly the Lord's day.
May the Lord look upon you in favor and give you pees.
So my Christmas cards this year will be my mug shot with my kids face photo shopped next to me....too ghetto?
i blame lastnights decisions on friday the 13th
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
I was sitting on the floor of CVS chugging white grape juice until someone asked me to leave.
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
the awesomest thing about staying behind in our lame ass dorm room by myself during spring break: I've now nutted in 3 inconspicuous locations on your side of the room. brag to me again about how fucking awesome tahoe is you shithead. I dare you.
He cut off part of his middle finger playing the knife game while singing The Knife Game Song at the top of his lungs. He also scream like a girl when his finger hit the floor and he realized he fucked up.
Randomize
