That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
there was enough confetti in my bra to throw another NYE party
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
Really? How much of his life do you think he remembers? I'm pretty sure 75% of it qualifies as "kind of a blur".
Oh Brad. Your poor brain, always being ignored for your penis and crazy women.
I am playing a little game I like to call "How Quickly Can I Infuse This Vodka Into My Bloodstream Without the Use of an IV"
Any time you've had a failed relationship, I blast No Sex for Ben by The Rapture and dance around my room. I wish I was joking.
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
I just KNEW this was gonna happen. NEVER say "all the free Jameson you can drink" around Tina.
i'm gonna crowd surf you onto his dick
You made me promise I wouldnt let you play "fuck fuck goose" with a 40 year old ever again.
Randomize
