It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
I'm home and safer than post-menopausal sex; you're welcome for the image. And yes, I did just use a semi-colon hammered.
If you can't find your cat in the morning it's cause i put him in the laundry basket and then put the laundry basket in the shower.
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
Apparently I was the fucked up drunk guy greeting people at the hotel in the lobby last night.
She's the one that asked you what my favorite color was & handed you a piece of bacon
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
Pain in my heart, regret in my vagina
I just ate beer and cupcakes for breakfast.... maybe this fourth of july won't be so bad
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
he sent me a green and gold dick pic and advised me I needed to come drive the snake from Ireland.
Based on my calculations, I should be blackout by approximately 11:14pm and that's when I need you to take my phone away from me. Mkay?
Randomize
