the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
You were absolutely insistent that the entire bar knew that it was peanut butter jelly time
after we had sex he went grocery shopping. at 6 am. i've never been more confused in my life
Shotgunned a beer while taking a bath.
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
in case you were wondering, even a BJ under a blanket on the back of a bus only lifts a 14-hour bus ride to borderline tolerable.
I'll be on pinterest all night planning crafty things to do with my cats in 10 years.
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
Honestly, if you can handle putting socks on you can handle a condom.
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
Walking my dog and eating a taco in last night's dress.. Classy
Woke up at my x's house. He said I talked about how much I love panda's for fourty five minutes. Then made him watch The Little Mermaid with me. Made the walk of shame infront of his mom. Things can only really go up from here.
Wait till you get home.
Randomize
